The ...Dot, Dot, Dot Experience

Sometimes we don't get to pick what happens in our days. Wait- we never really get to pick since we only know the moment we are in. I have had what I call the ...  (dot, dot, dot) experience of my life as my son has not been feeling well for about 5 days. My ... experience has included kisses on the forehead to take his temp, fluffing pillows, drawing a bath, snuggle bugging on the couch and checking in to see how I can serve him.

I realized this blessing in the midst of having "a plan" that got dissed when I woke up this morning. The plan was to clean the house, do laundry and generally get things back in order after a weekend of guests. I still feel compelled to try and get it done but I know that my pull to over-function is my way of managing anxiety. I have the opportunity to serve and be still and when I do it, it is one of my greatest joys.

There will always be something competing for our attention- the phone that rings, the dryer that dings the dogs that bark. In the quiet still of unexpected moments, we get to decide the ...

Home in My Heart

There is something so sweet
being known
a gentle breeze without a home

It creeps up in the still of the night
realizing there is nothing to fight

Shadow self gets to rest
and be in peace
despite the guest

Love so deeply without a fear
a juxtaposition rarely dear

Fighting for a place to be
wiggling in my skin to see-
what will be
and
what I am
deep within this desperate land

A place to hide
in cuddled arms
feeling her peace with little harm

Memories move me far from space
a gentle side of this life in race

I sink into my little girl
sitting quietly while I wait...

hoping my entry is not too late

When I Grow Old

When I grow old I want to be remembered for.........

living life out loud, going broke from fun, spontaneous trips to see old friends, phone calls when you needed it, picnics on Fridays, bringing people to Christ, laughing, loving deeply, making good food, giving cards when you least expect it, making a difference in my community, listening, teaching people how to communicate, never criticizing, loving my kids for who they are meant to be, having a great marriage, showing up, being trustworthy, speaking my truth in love, getting better vs. older, being wise, working hard, never giving up, being willing to learn, making eye contact, stopping to revel in nature, feeding birds, not swearing, talking to strangers, helping animals, being intuitive, having a home instead of a house, thriving instead of surviving, serving at church, being a great daughter, stopping to pick up trash, having wrinkles from smiling too much, being myself, loving myself and sharing myself!